Checkout Chump

We have a ten year old girl that has to complete a Science Fair project, which is due tomorrow.  Anyone want to guess when the bulk of the paperwork was completed?  Oh, yes.  That's right.  TONIGHT.  In Nooze's defense, the teacher wasn't particularly clear with instructions, and all area stores were out of those tri-fold backer boards.  I know this because I went to ALL of them.  I finally found one tonight, at W@lM@rt over in Satan's Buttcrack Extension.  The best part?  The price tag on the shelf noted a whopping cost of $3.74.  This made me happy.  VERY happy.

Until, that is, I checked out.  The price rang up at $7.97.  Confused, I asked the cashier to double check.  She complied, and requested a price check on the shelf.  One of her coworkers trudged off into the abyss to verify the price, but only after looking at me with disdain.  This upped my Irish severely, and I had all I could do to blurt, "So sorry to make you do your job, ya old goat!"  I held my tongue instead.  And waited.

And WAITED.  And WAITED.

The people behind me, who had rushed the checkout because, alas! It was one of four open, and Alak! I only had three items...began to grumble in disgust.  Yeah, I know.  I should have sucked it up and just paid the stupid money without a word.  However, I had verified the brand and item on the shelf sticker and wanted to be sure.

The line dwindled down to me and the hopeful lady behind me, who had already placed all of her items on the belt.  She looked genuinely confused. The cashier, to her credit, explained that there was a price discrepancy on one of my items.  The lady smiled slightly and nodded.  Good, right?

Not so much.

See, at that point, my phone began to ring.  LOUDLY.

I generally have a random ring tone set on my phone, something along the lines of Beethoven, or chimes, or just a generic ring.  Naturally, I grew a Wild Hair out of boredom during the ice storm...and changed it to Sims Japanese.  Sims Japanese, for those unfamiliar, is simply a Japanese woman yelling "Konichiwa!" at random, shrill and increasingly annoying levels.  I think it's funny.

Any guesses on the ethnicity of the woman standing in line behind me?

Yeah.

I casually reached into my purse, staring straight ahead, and pressed "END" on the phone without  looking at the name on the screen.  At that moment, the Other WM Employee returned, scanner in hand...and pretty much accused me of trying to steal the tri-fold board. 


It took everything in my soul not to blurt out, "Listen, woman.  If I was going to steal something around here, it wouldn't be this crappy thing.  It would be a baseball bat, so I could run up here and Go Boston on your kneecaps, you grouchy, rude old bag!"

I refrained.  Instead, I looked at her, eyebrows raised, and blurted, "Okay.  So it's acceptable for you to place items where you please, and my responsibility to mentally scan prices.  Whatever."

She stomped off.

In the end, she won.  I purchased the stupid tri-fold thing, at the ridiculous price of $7.97.  After all, the project is due TOMORROW.

As I was processing my debit transaction, the cashier shook her head and shrugged. "You know", she said, "I thought they'd fixed that shelf.  I had the same issue yesterday."

And people wonder why I live with migraines.