The questions below were stolen. Or borrowed.  Or copied.  Whatever.  [Thanks to Bikinfool for the "inspiration".]

1.  One of your scars...how did you get it?

Hmmm.  I have scarred knees from various and sundry skateboarding accidents from "back in the day".

2.  What is on the walls in your room?

Dust, mostly.

3.  Do you snore, grind your teeth, or talk in your sleep?

I talk in my sleep.  Regularly.  CONVERSATIONS.  My sister always knew who I was crushing on...

4.  What type of music do you listen to?

Whatever strikes my fancy at the moment.  It's currently set on "The Gaslight Anthem".  LOVE them.

5.  What time were you born?

11.17 am, August something, 197something.

6. What do you want more than anything right now?

For my kid not to be sick any more.  Seriously.  Migraines, sinus issues, colds...

7.  What do you miss?

My mum.

8.  What is your most prized possession?

I don't know.  My oven? I LOVE to bake.

9.  How tall are you?

Anywhere from 5' 4" to 5' 4 1/2".  Seriously.  I am SHORT.

10.  Do you get claustrophobic?

Yes.

11.  Do you get scared in the dark?

Not usually.

12.  The last person to make you cry?

My kid.  She's a sweetie.

13.  What's your worst fear?

I'd rather not discuss that one.

14.  What kind of hair/eye color do you like on people you're attracted to?

I like pretty much any combination, as long as it's attached to a male, and he isn't a tool.  I am a great fan of Real Men.  I have no patience for Wannabes or Pretty Boys.

15.  Where do you see yourself proposing?

I don't.  I've never been proposed TO, either.  Not really.  [And yes, I am married.  Happily.]

16.  Coffee or energy drink?

Coffee, with the strength of an energy drink.  I like it BOLD.

17.  Favorite pizza topping?

Mushrooms and black olives.

18.  If you could eat anything right now, what would it be?

A steak.  I have a sudden desire to be Meat Drunk.

19.  Favorite color of all time?

Green.

20.  Have you ever eaten a goldfish?

Cracker, yes.  Live, absolutely not.

21.  What is the most meaningful gift you've ever received?

See the Christmas post...

22.  Do you have a crush?

Sure.  Don't we all? [See #25]

23.  Are you double jointed?

Lord, no.

24.  Favorite clothing brand?

Whatever fits and doesn't make me look like someone's grandmother.

25.  Who is your favorite female/male celebrity?

Oh....three way tie! Bruce Campbell - Alec Baldwin - Jason Statham.  The first two for their meaty heads and sarcastic brilliance.  The last one for his bald pate and sarcastic brilliance.  Statham is actually too young for my taste, and almost too pretty.

26.  Do you have a pet right now?

Yes, I have two.

27.  What kind is it?

They are dogs.

28.  Would you fall in love knowing that the person is leaving?

Not on purpose.

29.  Say a number from 1 to 100?

27?

30.  Blondes or brunettes?

Usually brunettes, but it really boils down to personality.

31.  Favorite quote?

"He is a [sane] man who can have tragedy in his heart and comedy in his head." -GK Chesterton

32.  Favorite place?

Savannah, GA.

Checkout Chump

We have a ten year old girl that has to complete a Science Fair project, which is due tomorrow.  Anyone want to guess when the bulk of the paperwork was completed?  Oh, yes.  That's right.  TONIGHT.  In Nooze's defense, the teacher wasn't particularly clear with instructions, and all area stores were out of those tri-fold backer boards.  I know this because I went to ALL of them.  I finally found one tonight, at W@lM@rt over in Satan's Buttcrack Extension.  The best part?  The price tag on the shelf noted a whopping cost of $3.74.  This made me happy.  VERY happy.

Until, that is, I checked out.  The price rang up at $7.97.  Confused, I asked the cashier to double check.  She complied, and requested a price check on the shelf.  One of her coworkers trudged off into the abyss to verify the price, but only after looking at me with disdain.  This upped my Irish severely, and I had all I could do to blurt, "So sorry to make you do your job, ya old goat!"  I held my tongue instead.  And waited.

And WAITED.  And WAITED.

The people behind me, who had rushed the checkout because, alas! It was one of four open, and Alak! I only had three items...began to grumble in disgust.  Yeah, I know.  I should have sucked it up and just paid the stupid money without a word.  However, I had verified the brand and item on the shelf sticker and wanted to be sure.

The line dwindled down to me and the hopeful lady behind me, who had already placed all of her items on the belt.  She looked genuinely confused. The cashier, to her credit, explained that there was a price discrepancy on one of my items.  The lady smiled slightly and nodded.  Good, right?

Not so much.

See, at that point, my phone began to ring.  LOUDLY.

I generally have a random ring tone set on my phone, something along the lines of Beethoven, or chimes, or just a generic ring.  Naturally, I grew a Wild Hair out of boredom during the ice storm...and changed it to Sims Japanese.  Sims Japanese, for those unfamiliar, is simply a Japanese woman yelling "Konichiwa!" at random, shrill and increasingly annoying levels.  I think it's funny.

Any guesses on the ethnicity of the woman standing in line behind me?

Yeah.

I casually reached into my purse, staring straight ahead, and pressed "END" on the phone without  looking at the name on the screen.  At that moment, the Other WM Employee returned, scanner in hand...and pretty much accused me of trying to steal the tri-fold board. 


It took everything in my soul not to blurt out, "Listen, woman.  If I was going to steal something around here, it wouldn't be this crappy thing.  It would be a baseball bat, so I could run up here and Go Boston on your kneecaps, you grouchy, rude old bag!"

I refrained.  Instead, I looked at her, eyebrows raised, and blurted, "Okay.  So it's acceptable for you to place items where you please, and my responsibility to mentally scan prices.  Whatever."

She stomped off.

In the end, she won.  I purchased the stupid tri-fold thing, at the ridiculous price of $7.97.  After all, the project is due TOMORROW.

As I was processing my debit transaction, the cashier shook her head and shrugged. "You know", she said, "I thought they'd fixed that shelf.  I had the same issue yesterday."

And people wonder why I live with migraines.