Are you there, Mob? It's me, rennratt.

I was always warned of the potential dangers.  It can make you a little paranoid, they told me.  You are the kind that might obsess, they continued.  But did I listen?  Did I take heed?  Did I believe them?  Nope, nope and NOPE.

Well, it turns out they were right.  On every count, too.  Yep, having a stat counter and follow feeder can be dangerous, indeed.  How so?

Well, first, I'll explain the perks.  I know for a fact that my sister, my Bonus Mom, my Nudder Not Mudder...and a few random strays check in almost daily.  I'm cool with that.  It's nice to have familiar company, even when I'm not writing.

There are others, due to time, space, work, illness, etc that check in as often as time permits.  I know them, too.  I even recognize some of them...I mean, you...by IP address, click in/out, latitude/longitude...you get the picture.

Until now.  There is a vague...unsettling...if you will...about this one.  This new visitor spends extensive time here, clicking in and out of old posts, staggering through my history.  This person sometimes spends upwards of thirty minutes at a time here.

While I'd like to be Ooh, I'm so talented that they must. read. everything!, my stomach can't help but turn upside down and inside out a bit.  I mean, okay.  I get spending that kind of time on ESPN or the WVSR, but hey.  I'm...rennratt.  Your little random green haired office employee, hailing from the Edge of the Great Woods.

Don't get me wrong.  I totally dig the attention, and wouldn't think twice if it was from, say, Elon, Indiana or Grandma's Wrinkle, Idaho.  But this?  This visitor?  [S]he hails from...gulp...New Jersey.  And it's not the Pine Barrens, either.

Ooh, no.  This Jersey Boy/Girl hails from the general arena of Parsippany, which, to be honest, seems to be a skosh close to the great city of Newark.  This can only mean one thing:  The MOB is reading my blog!

This revelation, in turn, spurs further thoughts and panic into my crowded little cobweb of a skull.  What are they looking for?  What have I done/said?  Is this because I once equated Newark's airport with 'A random cesspit of Neanderthal proportions, chock full of sucktastic, sycophantic, power hungry Monkey Tools'?   Or the time I referred to New Jersey (as a whole) 'The trashcan of the Eastern United States'?  Or when I stated that 'New Jersey, Pennsylvania and Rhode Island should secede from the rest of the US to form its own, random, obnoxious little country'? I mean, I can't really take take any of those back.  I can't deny having said them.  Why?  Because they are all, in part or in whole, written here at rennratt for everyone to read.

Including the Mob.

To be completely truthful, I simply can not apologize for having said/written any of the above comments.  Why?  First of all, I have (unfortunately) spent enough time in the Newark airport to almost willingly gnaw my arm off in exchange for a shorter layover.  Second, I have certainly never met ruder people [even in Atlanta!  During a freak storm!  While traveling as a solo parent with a five year old!].  Third, anyone that has flown into Newark can attest to the beauty of the view while landing: An abandoned Hardee's, a fleet of [torched] semis...and a trash heap.  Yeah.  Welcome to Joisey.

Now, having fully upped the Irish [uh, or Italian or Russian] of this newly focused reader from the Heart of Liberty and Prosperity [Really?  THAT'S your state motto?  How...inaccurate],  I have a small favor to ask. In the spirit of...well, whatever spirit you currently hold [holiday, evil or even bourbon], please tell me who you are in the comments.  Yes, all of you.  Even if I know you from stat count or IP or out click.

I'm okay with 'fake names that I may know from elsewhere', how you know me, etc. 

'Cuz seriously?  That stat stuff is nerve wracking.

Much love [to you, too, Parsippany],

rennratt